A caregiver or parent caring for a child or individual with autism requires a deep sense of advocacy, care, commitment, love, and ultimately sacrifice. Parents often become the child’s or individual’s advocate, care coordinator, teacher, therapists, and emotional anchor. There are sometimes where the parent or caregiver has to switch their roles throughout the day and encompass all of the roles. The dedication that a parent or caregiver is truly amenable, but it can ultimately lead to parent burnout. Parent burnout can be defined as the lack of energy to be able to complete simple tasks, chronic emotional, mental, and physical fatigue, and the lack of motivation to do anything. Through parent burnout it can lead to an impact on both the child and parent.
Throughout the field of Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA), we discuss the importance of consistency, reinforcement, and the sustainability of a behavior change. Simply put for caregivers, a parent who is empty does not have the ability to pour into a cup. Caregivers and parents who are not able to maintain their own well-being will not have the ability to help their child with autism or any of their children and individuals whom they are caring for.
Understanding Parental Burnout
Parent burnout occurs when there is a high demand for the caregiver consistently exceeding their emotional, mental, and physical resources readily available. For parents who are caring for their children and their child with autism, there is often a heightened range of burnout due to:
- Advocacy Responsibilities
- Balance of Responsibilities for Other Children
- Behavioral Challenges
- Feelings of Being Isolated or Guilt When Taking Time Away
- Intensive Therapy Schedules
- Limited Resources or Support
- Parent Trainings
- Sleep Disruptions
Parents feel as though they are demonstrating signs of weakness by not being able to be “Superhuman” and feeling overwhelmed. However, it is a signal that the parent needs support and recovery.
Key Indicators of Burnout
While in the moment, the parent or caregiver may not recognize the early indicators for parent burnout. When the parent or caregiver is able to begin to recognize the early indicators it allows for them to be able to intervene early without them feeling overwhelmed. Some common indicators include:
- Behavioral Indicators
- Difficulty concentrating or
- Feeling overwhelmed by mundane tasks or simple things.
- Reduced engagement in routines.
- Withdrawal from social activities, situations, and passionate things.
- Emotional Indicators
- Feeling emotionally drained or numb to situations.
- Easily irritable or frequently frustrated
- Increased anxiety or sadness
- Loss of patience to be able during routine interactions.
- Physical Indicators
- Changes in appetite.
- Chronic fatigue.
- Increase or decrease in weight.
- Sleep difficulties.
When looking at this from an ABA perspective, these are all observable and measurable behaviors which signal a decreased caregiver capacity. When a caregiver begins to demonstrate these behaviors, it signals that they are not able to engage in with their child or even with themselves. As caregiver capacity decreases,treatment consistency and family functioning begins to become affected.
The Clinical Importance of Breaks
In ABA, there is often discussion regarding maintenance and generalization. This simply means that the skill is in your repertoire and you can do it in any environment that you are in. The skill has the ability to be sustainable over time and across environments. For a caregiver, this is no different.
Taking breaks can lead to a caregiver having restored emotional regulation, reduced stress-related reactivity, increased consistency in implementing behavioral strategies, and strengthened parent-child relationships . When caregivers are feeling well, they are able to produce better behavioral services with their child.
Common Barriers to Seeking Support
Many parents hesitate to step away from their child even briefly. Some of the most common barriers we hear regarding concerns include:
- “I feel too guilty stepping away for one minute.”
- “There is no reliable help out there for my child.”
- “It is my responsibility to always take care of my child.”
- “My child has behavioral issues and it is only maintained when I am there.”
- “No one understands my child.”
Parents should understand that they are valid reasons to feel as though they cannot take a break. Parents should not avoid taking breaks since it can lead to long-term burnout, emotional exhaustion, mental awareness, and decreased effectiveness as a caregiver.
Practical Strategies for Caregivers
There are some ways that parents are able to take breaks away for themselves. A parent can take a micro-break where they schedule 5-15 minutes for themselves where they are able to enjoy a quick walk outside, reading a few pages of a book, talking to one of their friends, or simply engaging in some mindfulness activities. You are able to think of this as a reset interval that is quick and easy to occur.
A more moderate approach includes seeking out respite care or potential support rotation. In utilizing respite care it allows for there to be temporary relief and can be arranged through your insurance company, community programs, family members, and local disability support services. This will allow for the parent or caregiver to use respite care for a few hours per week to be able to devote time to completing tasks that the caregiver needs for themselves or their home. Through building a support rotation it will allow for there to be a predictable schedule with trusted individuals who know how to assist with the child. Consistency leads to the parent/caregiver knowing who will be taking care of the child.
High priority is to engage in one activity per week or month of your choosing. It is essential to have the parents to be able to select the activity that helps to support their well-being. The activity can be as simple as attending a therapy session or sitting down on the porch just for one hour.
Supporting Your Child Through Your Absence
It is okay to teach your children that parents require breaks as well. You are able to use a visual schedule or some type of reminder that you are taking a break and remind them who they can go to for help. As your child allows for you to be able to participate in your break, provide them reinforcement.
Grant Yourself Permission
Remember, you are human, and your well-being is the foundation upon which your caregiving is built. It is okay—and essential—to take a break to replenish your own spirit. Far from being an act of selfishness, stepping away to rest is a vital act of self-preservation. When you grant yourself permission to recover, you are not failing; you are ensuring that you have the emotional and physical resources to continue showing up for those who depend on you. A restored caregiver is a more patient, effective, and present caregiver, capable of pouring love into others because they have first taken the time to fill their own cup.